Let's Talk "Adventure"...

Shall we???

Someone once told me that I shouldn't feel upset about leaving a place that I loved... that I should look at moving to a new place as an "adventure".  Having moved around the world (literally) and knowing that when I move it's always a *new start*, I don't really look forward to moving.  Just the logistics are a pain-in-the-ass... not to mention a lack of friends and having absolutely no support system.

Let me tell you about my little "adventure" that started yesterday morning.  I took the hubs to the airport because he's going to be gone for a good part of this month (August).  On my way home, I decided to stop at the brand new Subway and pick up a turkey sub (added bacon, no lettuce, no mayo, just a lot of veg and light on the oil and vinegar).  I took the foot-long home and ate half, wrapping the other half up for later that evening.

About two hours later (around 3:00 PM or so), my stomach starts to feel crampy.  I bolt for the bathroom and blow chunks - all of the sandwich that I just ate.  ZOMG.  It's wretched.  And I keep vomiting.  I throw up until there's nothing left but bile.  And I keep throwing up.  I can't drive to the ER because I'm running a fever and can't stop dry-heaving and shaking.  My husband is not here and I realize that I don't know a fucking soul except for my real estate agent.  She's got three kids - I can't call her to drive me to the ER.  There's no cabs that run this late.  If I want to go to the ER, well... I'm going to have to call an ambulance.

So... I call the RN-Emergency nurse that comes with my health care provider.  She and I go through everything (with my dry-heaving every two minutes or so - really pleasant conversation!!) that I ate and what kind of food poisoning that I might have... and she introduced me to staphylococcus aureus.  Meat that is not left cold enough, or cross-contaminated with eggs or bad mayo.  Vomiting and symptoms last for 24 - 72 hours.  Yeah, it's a winner.  Luckily, after throwing up for well over 20 hours, I'm able to keep water and popsicles down - without throwing up (right now).  And I'm not done with it yet - I may have to still go to the hospital.  Luckily, my realtor is willing to take me late this afternoon if I keep barfing.

I want to say "thank you" to my friends who kept checking on me (the husband is working in a white noise environment and has had his cell phone locked up, so no calling him) and making sure that I was okay, even if they were hundreds of miles away.  Thanks to the nurse that I spoke with and the kind people at the Health Department.  Luckily, I'm in good health so I probably won't have to deal with this much longer - and fingers crossed that I won't have to go to the ER.

I also want to say a bright and lively "FUCK YOU" to the asshole* who wouldn't listen to me when I was trying to explain about having a SUPPORT SYSTEM after I moved.  That this is not so much an "adventure" as a lifestyle change and that I would be on my own (literally and figuratively).  If I had ended up with a different form of food poisoning, it could've been much, much worse.  And what makes me want to throw up (just on principle) is that there is not one person that I could've called to take care of my dog.  Take your "adventure" and shove it straight up your smug ass - because if you think this shit is fun, you're fucking delusional.

*Why don't I have any friends??  Why can't I keep them??  

How about shit like this???  And, no, I'm not going to apologize.

You know who you are.

All. About. Moi. Updated "Bucket List".

Tomorrow, I turn 40.  At the end of last year and at the beginning of this one, I thought that things would be very different (as far as plans were concerned).  Some of my closest friends were going to come in and entertain me for my 40th.  One of those friends is seriously busy with her children's summer schedule - and the other person is a friend no more.  It's all right, though.  Husby has scheduled a bunch of things... so this has turned into "Juggsy Week".

On Sunday, we went and met with sea lions and swam with dolphins.  Best Backstage package EVER.  Worth ALL the money (with all photos - almost $600) and then some!!  A glimpse:

The boys were putting on a show for us!!  Hubs and I are on the back wall with all the trainers.  

After the whole day excursion, we were exhausted.  No cooking for us!!  As a treat, we stopped at Whataburger  on the way home.  I absolutely adore their patty melts (to die for) and the spicy ketchup is a must-try.  Afterwards, we came home, showered all the salt off, and then took a lazy nap together.  I would absolutely do this again.  There are some really cool things to see and do around here... I've just got to put them all together in one place.  After that, we can pick different things to do over the weekends.  

I know it's not NOLA.  But, with a few mental adjustments (and knowing that I can visit NOLA any time I want to), life here is pretty great.  It's laid back and comfortable here.  So, on the cusp of turning 40 in about an hour and a half, I crossed most stuff off that I had been wanting to do.  And... I updated my Bucket List quite a bit.  Now, it seems far more exotic, and a lot more expensive for me to do... so here goes:

Lieux à visiter avante de moirer

• Urban exploration (otherwise known as UrbEx).  I'd love to see some of the creepier abandoned sanitariums and hospitals...  I read this site quite a bit and absorb the material like a sponge.  I absolutely love that they give you the history of the building(s) and have approximate dates as to when they were built all the way up to present day.
• Nuclear tour of Chernobyl and the abandoned working town, Pripyat.  I can remember this happening when I was younger and simply could NOT understand the ramifications of nuclear power.  Therefore, when I read that the Ukrainians had opened the area up for assisted tours, I simply had to put this tour on my list.  Sure, Eastern European food isn't the best... but I'll live. Oh, the irony.
• Taking a month to leisurely sail up the river all throughout France... in an all inclusive luxury small passenger liner... stopping in whatever village or town that looks interesting.  I think I would do it every summer until I had completed the entire Avalon experience.  They offer so many cruises, it would be really damned difficult to try and figure out what the first one would be...
• Attend a friend's wedding in the spring.  I'd like to drive up and stop at weird attractions and stay in funky (not funky BAD, but funky GOOD) and fun places to stay.  Something like this or this or this (although I know that B. wouldn't even consider staying in an "ice hotel" - I'd like to do it at least once!!!  I'm still looking for fun, boutique hotels in each state, so I'd like to visit and travel around the US more often.  Maybe I'll get my "Geaux 'Merrica!!" patriotism back.  Somehow, I doubt this... but there's always room for improvement, right??

That's all for tonight.  I'm saying goodbye to my 30's and entering my 40's in about 8 minutes.  If my 40's are as good as my 30's were... I'm in for one wild fuck of a ride!!  x0x0

Time. Hunting Down The Perfect...

House.

I'm back to looking at houses.  Which means, yes, we'll be buying our THIRD fucking house.  And the budget I have (compared to the other two combined) is ginormous.  Seriously.  And I have time - which is a rich thing to have as a buyer.  I will have the ability to put in multiple bids AND eventually decide on what I would like.  The husband travels so much that this house will be mine, for the most part... so I've got to be comfortable in it while he's gone.  Choggie has aged and sometimes doesn't hear the knock on the door or the ringing of the bell.  :0((

Simple list....

• House has to be over 1800 SQF.
• House has to have a garage (single is good, double is better).
• House has to have a minimum of three bedrooms, three + den, or three + family room.  Husby and I want our separate offices AND a guest room always prepared for people.  Yeah, Tito.  I know.  I'm fucking crazy and you'd "never risk it".  STFU.  And, yes.  I was "talking to you."  Want to prove something???  Send her down.  Go build something or take your own vacation.
• House has to have a good kitchen - no exceptions.  Exceptions will be made if the house is below budget; therefore, making the renovations happen within the budget.
• Skylights.  They are big-huge-awesome here.  I'd love to have more than the two in each bath.
• Screened-in porch.  Useless in June, July, and August... yet worth their weight in gold during the other not-so-hot months.  I'm already planning on sleepy furniture!!
• I'm good with late '70s to early '80s retro.
• Would love an in-ground pool.  This is probably not ever happening because the husband doesn't like them.  A bitch can hope, right???  :P

If the flooring sucks -

We'll replace it (hardwoods, tile, whatever)

If the wall color blows -

We'll repaint it.  All in one long weekend, hopefully.

Landscaping - plenty o' companies.

Appliances I hate - changed out.  I'm missing having a Jenn-Aire stove.  NEEDED.

That's it for now.  My list probably looks like it belongs to a spoiled child, but I don't care.  I want this house to be "it" for us (at least 5 years).  

Under Pressure.

Life. Good Stuff.

The journey to Baltimore-DC area was a crazy one.  My niece's wedding was really great, intimate, well-thought-out, and everything from the dress to the flowers, and all the food was fabulous.  The "destination resort" we stayed at was not disappointing at all.  The hot tub in the room was huge and could've fit four people - the bathroom was very spa-like.  All glass shower, beautiful tiles, and everything well thought out.  Huge king-sized bed, awesome pillows, light down comforter, excellent views, and it was also very "please don't bring your child(ren) here" discouraging.  Not cots, no cribs, no family rooms.  Only adults in the pool.  For my child-free ass, that was a HAPPY PLACE.

Unfortunately, the rental car sucked.  We were assigned a 2015 Jeep Compass... wow.  The dead have more options and move faster..  The engine was too small and the body was too heavy.  It couldn't get out of it's own way.  Trying to get on to | 495 and it was just pathetic.  It could also be that I really don't care for an SUV (it's like a cheesy station-wagon on steroids) and find that most people who drive them, can't.  Let's not even discuss parking.

And... I also scored my first speeding ticket in over 7 years.  Fucker clocked me at 41 MPH in a 35 MPH zone.  Ticket cost??  $130.  NO SHIT.  The Super Trooper managed to tell me that the "State of Florida won't be informing your insurance company as long as you pay the court your ticket."  What a fucking racket!!  My husband keeps picking on my not being able to drive 41 MPH.  This is such a non-win, it wasn't even funny.

For the good news...  the house hunt starts tomorrow.  We received all of our paperwork back from USAA and we've been all pre-approved.  I've already been saving interesting houses from realtor[dot]com and my budget is very generous (to say the least).  I also have a budget for immediate renovations before we move in... for instance, hardwood flooring (except for the bedrooms - because I want carpet), tile in the kitchen and baths, new hardware (if I don't like what's in there), countertops, and cabinet resurfacing.  So, I'm not really worried about the cosmetic stuff with the house - I just want to find the best house that fits our lifestyle.  And, yes... having a dedicated guest bedroom and bath is at the top of the list (I'm so dangerous and all... expecting people to come and visit me - hahahahahaaaaaa).  :D  I'd also like a soaking tub in the master bath, but if it doesn't have it (and maybe has a jacuzzi outside or something), I can live.

My biopsy also came back... it's negative!!!

And I have another job interview tomorrow... which may take me a whole lot closer to the Audi TT that I want to get after we buy our house.

PCB /to/ NOLA /to/ Biloxi and back /to/ PCB.

An epic amount of travel for three whole days... but I'm not complaining.  Had to get my biopsy done on in NOLA on Wednesday afternoon (1:00 PM - but I left PCB at 6:15 AM that morning), then ran some errands (picked up a couple of cases of Abita Beer, gumbo file, cajun spices, a small bag of red beans, and some petit fours), grabbed a rotisserie chicken and NOLA-style potato salad (for dinner).  I also provided some pre-mixed cocktails, Long Island Iced Tea (Cuervo Skinny) which were not at all disappointing!!  I wish I took a picture of it - because it was delicious and not the shit-tastic mess I was thinking it would be - at all.  Yum!!  L and I had our cocktails and front-porched it (my most favorite evening thing to do in my old 'hood).

(Looking down my street from the awesomeness of the front porch!!)

The Vee-Dubs was glad to be back in her old neighborhood, too.  I still have the NOLA inspection sticker on the front (even though my license plate is from Florida now).  Since N & L rent out my old house, I street-park now... no more fancy for me!!

(There she is... back where she should be... minor dents and all!!)

After all the excitement of Wednesday night, I reluctantly packed the car on Thursday morning - but it wasn't as dreary as I was expecting.  I headed to Mississippi to pick up one of my very good friends and treat her to a night out (did someone just say "Girl's Night"??  Oh, yesssssssss!!!).  We booked a room at the IP Casino in Biloxi, which is a casino, resort, spa, pool on the 11th floor, and excellent room service.  This is our second visit and it was just as fun as the first time around!!  I had brought some "Hurricane" pouch drinks from New Orleans, and we started with those...

(You know, because I just came in from NOLA - we had to toast the city in our own way!!)

Then, we went exploring around the casino, checking out the pool, taking various elevators (all which seemed slightly shaky and a bit dodgy) and came across this gem (can't say that either one of us was really interested in attending this concert - for fuck's sake, I thought she was dead or in a loony bin - but apparently is still doing the B-level casino concert bit)....

(She's had so much plastic surgery, if she sits near a campfire, she'll either go up in flames or simply fucking melt!!)

Yeah, you read that right.  Liza - in the plasti-flesh.  We had such a good giggle over all that - it was hilarious.  I think that a good portion of the Q-tips may have hit up the box office, though.  The elevators going up there were full!!  

We headed back up to our room, to open our big ol' box o' Franzia (Sunset Blush - the boxed-bagged wine that never stops) and proceeded to have a fabulous time watching "National Lampoon's Vacation" and catching up on all the cray-cray shit that's been going on in our lives.  This, of course, is way better than drinking and texting or Skyping... and we took advantage of it - staying up fairly late (well, really late), ordering room service.  In the morning, we ordered room service and got pancakes with a bourbon-apple sauce to spread on them.  It was a great evening!!!

And guess what?????  I didn't get *dangerous*!!  I could have, you know.  I had alcohol, ice, and a cheaply serrated "knife" that I'm pretty sure (had I been sober enough), I could've ground into a shank.  That never happened.  The proof???  Right here...

(It would've taken me half a week in a prison hole in order to make THAT a killing weapon.  Sorry, C.!!  I did my best to appease the peanut gallery, but I guess I failed miserably at that.  Le sigh.)

So, we check out of the casino this morning, and I was back on my way to PCB.  Got home before the husband did, emptied out the car, and then we went out to one of our favorite seafood shacks.  I don't have a lot of pressing stuff to do this weekend, and the boob hurts a bit, but I'm sure I can just hack it off if it becomes a bother.  

And if you're feeling adventurous or need some kind of entertainment....  play THIS.  It's Dangerous!!!

Road Tripping. New Orleans. Popping In.

***Sorry about picture sizes... they are a bit blurry***

I left on Saturday to head back to New Orleans.  Sadly, I don't think that I expected the reaction I had... once I drove into the city proper, I cried.  The Super Dome, the Smoothie Center, the Crescent City Connection, the mighty Mississippi River, and of course, my old "barn" of a house (L & N live there now, so it's like having family living in a multiple-generation home).  

***The sign on |10 directing me to the Westbank (AKA "The Bestbank")

Of course, we front-porched it.  That was after going to eat at this excellent hibachi and sushi restaurant in Metairie...  Shogun.  My host and hostess (S & L) have been going there for 17 years, and let me tell you, that restaurant did NOT disappoint.  A large hot sake, soup, salad (ginger dressing to die for), special hibachi rice, spicy noodles, and I had the seafood combination (lobster, sea scallops, and shrimp).  Veggies included zucchini, onions, mushrooms, and sprouts... the mushrooms were my favorite (they just absorbed all the sauces and spices).  Nothing was bad.  Highly recommend and I'll do a Yelp review tomorrow.  

Grabbed lunch with L on the go... she had a ton of errands to run, and guess what??  I did, too!!  Husby is in St Louis for the rest of the week, and I kept getting texts.  So... Abita Beer party pack, Cafe du Monde chicory coffee, sweet and salty honeyed cashews, Richard's fresh green pepper (read "spicy") smoked sausage, NOLA potato salad, and comic book store items.  And... delicious soaps from a soap maker that's local.  They smell almost like a fresh French milled soap, but the price was right and I picked myself up some and picked out two additional for a VERY good friend of mine.  I didn't find a tee-shirt that struck my fancy at the comic place, so I ended up getting the new "Fight Club 2" comic.  Honestly, I could go wild in Crescent City Comics... they had some of the best graphic novels ever and I could've blown a whole lot of money in there.

For dinner on Sunday, S made homemade ricotta and Italian sausage raviolis with a sauce to DIE FOR.  Deliciously excellent.  :0))  I need to pick up on some of his tips and tricks and start using my Kitchen Aid professional mixer far more often.  Seriously!!  Plus, it's relatively easy but looks FABULOUS when finished.  

**Disclaimer:  I did not take food porn pics.  Apologies.** 

Monday was nothing but appointments.  I've been deemed healthy by my internist.  YAY!!!  Met a friend for lunch (between appointments) and went to Manhattan Jack - she was craving bagels with lox.  I pouted, because I was too late for an everything bagel that I wanted (sold out) and they stopped making their Monte Cristo sandwiches (one of my utter and absolutely favorite nom-nom-nom foods).  Haven't found a replacement since they took theirs off the menu.  Definitely can't find them here in Florida, so....  boo!!

Spent an uneventful night because I was planning on stopping at Rouses AGAIN and I was wiped out by all the go-go-geaux!!!  pace that we went with all weekend.  So, I ended up leaving NOLA around noon-ish on Tuesday, but there was a great reason.... I could spend some down time with Cat!!!!!

I was, indeed, able to stop in her area on the way home... bearing gifts of candy cashews AND peanut-brittle type peanuts.  She shocked me by giving me my birthday gift early...  it is THE DUDE from the 'Big Lebowski'.  Check it out!!

She knows me and put a lot of thought into it.  :D

Her husband, M, found me two of my obsoleted favorite cartoon shows... 'The Oblongs' and 'Moral Orel' and burned them to disk for me.  HAPPINESS!!  So, with that awesomeness, I'm going to sign off for now.  Thank you so much, Cat!!!  Treasured forever!!!  x0x0

Not Giving A Fuck. And... Giving A Fuck.

There are certain things that I have just quit caring about.  I don't think that I really gave too much of a fuck to begin with (it's in my nature), but some things in life just are not worth worrying about.  At this point, I just don't want to be bothered with:

• How some people feel.  Too bad, so sad.  Go find someone to shrink your head.  I'm not it.
• How some people attempt to make me feel.  Quit.  Go guilt some other person.  Go away.
• Behaving much like an adult.  Being the grown-up in a situation sucks. 
• Having to keep my atomic pie-hole shut.  Because that's what the adults do.  See???
• Being baited.
• Not putting people in the middle of shit.  Leaving things alone.
• Gamma*, don't go away mad.  Gamma*, just go away.

Now, here are the things that I do care very much about.  And some of the things that I care about might be a bit materialistic, but it is what it is.  :0))

• My friends.  J, C, CLV, AS, CS, KLD, JS, JB, LF, and (Mom)RL... thank you all for being there for me continuously.  Even though everyone is weathering their own storms at times, I have never hesitated to pick up the phone and call any of you.  And vice-versa.  Most of you have been there for me since before I graduated high school (some have come along in recent years), but even over a span of time, I can pick up the phone and call... and you're there. 
• My derby family.  From Shreveport, to New Orleans, and now in Florida... all of you are truly amazing and brilliant women.  Polly and Shootzie (Shreveport) - it was so good to see you both and hang out for a couple of nights.  Minute Maid, Holly, Darko, Marie LaFreaux, Strangler, and Amity... you made me part of the NOLA derby scene and I miss you all.  Can't wait to go back and see you bull run!!!
• Awesome friends and neighbors, S&L, who were gracious and wonderful to all the friends I introduced to the NOLA way of life... and who made sure we were there for Christmas Eve, NYE, and all the crawfish boils... working out doggie day care and helping out with letting me crash over there when our AC went out one weekend (and letting me stay while I finished up with our house).  L&N live in our old house and I can't wait to see them, either.  L is one of the sweetest people I've ever met and I'm so proud and happy to be her friend.
• Choggie.  I love her so much and she's the sweetest, most loveable pup-dog ever.  I'm thankful for every day that she's with us (she's 12 and has had some health problems as of late) and I make sure that I do something for her every single day that makes her happy.  Note:  I can't catch a squirrel, so that's out.  But chew-eez and belly rubs and walks are not.  :0))
• My husband.  Everyone who knows who we are understands.  Nothing more to be said - except I love him more than anything.
• The opportunities that will be happening over the next year.  Travel to interesting places across the United States, Europe, and Japan.  Possibly some road trips to see extended family and friends who live nearby and further away.  Looking forward to catching up with Nikki Talley and Jason Sharp... two of my favorite musicians (they're touring now - Google!!).
• Having people come to visit me.  :0))  This makes me really, really dangerously happy.  I enjoy company and introducing them to where I live.  Oh, I get a bit excited, but I don't juggle with butcher knives or anything.  Instead, I use the knives to get appetizers ready, cut veggies, make cheese trays, and sliced fruit prepared.  Wine and beer and sweet malt beverages are chilled, the guest room and bath prepared, and a fun visit is guaranteed. 

I guess that's all for now.  I think I had to vent the bad before I could post the good.  Thanks for reading.  Send comments if you'd like.  x0x0

*Gamma - Google (Urban Dictionary is quite interesting on the subject also).

On My Own.

This is definitely not a *pity party*, so don't mistake it for one.  I was simply looking at my husby's work calendar and it looks like he'll be home for a grand total of 31 days out of the next 90 (and that includes the 4 days that we'll be flying to DC for a wedding in July).  It's not me that I'm worried about - it's him.  Speaking from experience, it utterly sucks to have to live in hotels for 2 - 3 weeks on end, although I will concede that the housekeeping and room services are nice. 

Previous to moving here (and while getting settled in), I was looking forward to inviting friends from different areas of the country to come and spend some time with me while the husband was gone, you know, just to have company and enjoy the beautiful beaches (and delicious seafood, shopping, and amenities).  Now??  Only a handful of people have made the invite list thanks to a "real" eye-opening experience during my move.  There's really only a small handful of friends I want to entertain (CR, JL, LF, S&L, L&N)... and after I make my solid schedules with them, I will be traveling instead of being the hostess. 

In June, I'll be heading back to New Orleans for a long weekend.  I'm so excited to go - I can't wait to see my friends and do the "front porching" thang!!  Since L&N moved into our old house, I can stay there also, if I want to.  There's a list of restaurants that I want to go to and I'm looking forward to seeing some of my favorite co-workers.  I love NOLA!!  :D

Hopefully, on my way home, I can stop and see another bestie - and we can hang out in Gulfport for a night or two.  I'm looking forward to firming plans up and grabbing some Franzia and room service.  Lounging by the pool on the top of the hotel would be cool - seeing the ocean as we swim.  Laughing and having a good time and not having a worry in the world. 

In July, we'll be attending my niece's wedding in DC.  She's actually getting married in Chevy Chase, MD (which makes me laugh - considering how much I love the "National Lampoon's Vacation" movies.  It's going to be a quick jaunt, but we should be able to throw in a little sightseeing.  I'd like to go to the Smithsonian - but with the time constraints??  I should probably lower my expectations.

Since husby is gone for most of the month of August, I may go to New England.  I'll probably skip most of Massachusetts (except to stop and see JL and two of my favorite cousins) and then head straight to Maine.  I don't want to run into anyone - considering how dangerous I can be!!!  ;)

Those are my plans for now... of course, things are subject to change.  I'm On My Own for a little while, but I'm going to take advantage of that and check off a bunch of stuff on my list.  Arizona and California are on the short list also... just depends on how much time I do have and what the flight prices look like. 

Compared to what March, April, and May looked like... summer is gleaming like a gem!! 

Adjustments and Adulting

Things are finally pretty calm here after the horrible move and all the drama that ensued during it.  Our temporary house is as furnished and put together as well as can be expected.  Our physical space has been  downsized quite a bit and we're still finding this home quite a bit smaller than what we'd like.  Don't get me wrong, I love the cathedral ceilings and sunken living room, but the kitchen is a lot smaller than I'm used to and the husby feels a tad bit claustrophobic in his office.  So, after a productive conversation this evening, we've made a new list of needs for the (new) semi-permanent house that we will soon start actively looking for.  And our dream list??  Here:

• Three bedrooms (four if we don't have a separate family room (we want a dedicated guest bedroom).
• Two baths (an additional half-bath would be desirable, but not necessary).
• Larger kitchen (I'd like to have an island or a bar for guests to sit at).
• Hardwoods or laminate throughout (we're willing to rip out carpets and install new flooring).
• New tile for the bathroom (I'm eyeing some slate...  delicious!!).
• Soaking tub/garden tub for moi.
• Full paint job - using some of the colors I love (husby agreed).
• Garage.
• Screened in attached porch (AKA "Florida Room").
• Living closer to the beach.

I think I found an excellent realtor and our budget is pretty large (I'm still pushing for the in-ground pool, though - just because I'd love to have one) - so I'm sure we'll have a lot to choose from.  Besides, compared to New Orleans, property here is seriously cheap.  

Husby's schedule is crazy...  he's gone for two weeks in June, comes home for two days, then does his week-long reserve duty in Missouri.  He'll have two weeks home and then we fly up to DC for a four day weekend (one of my favorite nieces is getting married.... squeeeeeeee!!).  After that, two weeks at home and then B heads out again for another three weeks.  Anyone have any non-crafty hobby suggestions???  Derby season will be pretty much wrapping up after that, so I need to find something to occupy some of my free time!!!

I am planning on having company come in from Massachusetts, California, and Louisiana while B is away (importing friends again... 10 shades of North Carolina - ugh) - but if you want to visit, shoot me a PM if we're friends on FB or email me at findingjuggsy[at]gmail.com.  I love to entertain!!!  :0))  I promise I'm not "dangerous" or anything... hahahahaha!!

Cha-Cha-Changes.

David Bowie was spot-on.

Changes happen.  Oh, fuck, do they happen.  And we all roll with the punches of life, don't we??  Dealing with a mortgage, rent, utilities, work, and extra-curricular activities are absolutes.  If you don't pay your utilities, they will be shut off.  Everyone deals with the same issues and makes a change if necessary.  Don't have enough gas money each month??  Might have to switch priorities - the additional cell phone has to go OR the dining out once a week has to be canceled.  That's something every adult member of society (for the most part) can understand.  But the big question I have is:  why can't we admit to (or even consider) changing our minds???

Thoughts, ideas, theology, politics, hypotheses - these things are not solid.  They are fluid and malleable.  They can all be changed.  It can be a large thing that happens; an agnostic has a near-death experience and decides to find a religion that works... or it can be a small thing; you're given a hand-up and you decide to pay it forward.  Either way, your perspective has changed and you've decided to do something a little differently -regardless as to whether your conscious mind knows it or not.

Then why, oh why do people try and push their religious agenda on their fellow human beings by using the secular legal system?? Why can't we have an open dialogue, listen to the other side, and maybe - just maybe - change our way of thinking??  Or at the minimum, accept that another person CAN have a viewpoint that differs from your own??  Because it's fucking scary, that's why.  We've become a nation that believes "changing our mind" means "flip-flopping" (thanks to political pundits and our sorry educational system, a stunningly large portion of people believe everything that happens on the bullshit box - AKA "television") and that the concept of "flip flopping" is baaaaaaaaaad.  Really??

Confession:  I *am* a "flip-flopper".  Oh, the shame.  The humanity!!

Yes, I am an opinionated person.  Yet, if I'm having an educated (civil) discussion about a topic and find out that I didn't know as much as I thought I did... if I was dead-on wrong about the subject??  I'd end up going home, mull things over, find various articles, read about the subject (preferably from both viewpoints), and will more than likely discuss the topic with other friends.  You know, gain a new perspective and all that shit??  Yep.  And guess what?  It's about a 50-50 chance that I might change my bloody mind.  That's right, Internet.  I said it.

Luckily, I have friends who are very diverse and who are also very accepting of my choices... I am, after all, an out-of-the-closet atheist.  Oh, and a liberal.  And a Massachusetts Yankee (living in the Bible Belt).  And a hedonist (by nature).  And I'm also child-free-by-choice.  I don't hide what I am.

So... do you feel like getting together?? Maybe having a couple of cocktails and talking about something interesting??  I'm in - if you are.

Rational dialogue for the win.

Poor Grammar. The Name Game. Bad Buffets.

This post may be a little ramble-y, so please bear with me.  I can be a bit of a grouchy grammar-nazi. Oh, sure, some of the things I write on this blog are not grammatically correct or maybe even spelled right (although I use the spell check religiously); however, I do grasp the importance of being able to spell and write properly.  And, admittedly, I do pull a Judge-y McJudgerson when I see *text speak* - or when people write phonetically.  I tend to think that they are unintelligent and lazy (in that particular order, ThankYouVeryMuch) and can't be bothered with being correct.  Perfect example(s):

At Our Local Pet Store

Clerk (ringing me up):  "This weather be crazy!!  I was wearing a beach dress yesterday and sweating to beat the second line!!  Can you believe I'm now in snow pants???

(Can only understand a fraction of this until she repeats a second time)

Juggsy:  "I can't get used to it!!  One day I'm hot, one day I'm freezing.  Ugh!!  (All the while I'm trying to get my shit and "git" ASAP).

Clerk:  "This weather has certainly been by-ronic!!  We all gunna die from the flu and the ebola, too!!

Juggsy:  "Yes, the weather has been IRONIC (big emphasis on IRONIC) and I'm ready for spring." 

Clerk:  "Oh, baby girl!!  Bless  your heart!!  You've gotten my term wrong... it's BY-RONIC."  

No need to fight.  Just took my bags and left.  Seriously.  I do have to hand it to the clerk... she was outgoing, friendly, and could fucking multi-task.  I mean, telling me how my grammar sucked, while swiping my items through a scanner AND bagging.  Where is Donald Trump's next CEO when SHE'S RIGHT HERE???  Can I get a finders fee???  Pretty please???

The Names

Over the last month, I've noticed names and name tags.  Partially because of the culture, but others were just of the 'kr8ive" mind (it fucking KILLS ME to write "creative" that way).  Quite frankly, I just asked how they pronounce their own names, rather than embarrass myself.  Some are: 

• Rayvyn - seriously???  You needed to have two y's??)
• Ahlyviaa - AKA Olivia.  Horrid.  Oh, HORRID.
• Rainbow and Brooke Trout (identical twins).  Punny, at best.  But still gag-worthy.
• Dick (for a surname) - as in Rusty Dick.
• Shirma (pronounced Shah-Nee-Kwah) - gawd forbid you say it wrong!!

Bad Buffets

And why we don't eat at them, ever.  Unless highly recommended by other CFBC peeps...

I quit eating at buffets when we lived overseas.  Why?  Because 90% did not offer a buffet and of those that did, catered to the US (read: young, with children AND hugely also consisting of a large elderly population that may not have the money to do something better)... MASSIVELY huge family base restaurant with a handful of broke E1 or E2 soldiers going there, too.  I sincerely stopped going when I saw a toddler up to his ELBOWS in the mashed potatoes.  And when I went to get a manager...???  Her excuse happened to be "kid's will be kids."  NEVER.  NEVER again am I going to ANY buffet.  No fucking how, NO FUCKING WAY.  

Please don't worry about my blood-pressure.  It's very happy.  I'm going to see a good friend tomorrow, and she's the bomb diggity.  Just wish our other bestie could come and sing some Johnny Cash, too.

Lagnaiappe

A picture of me.  Oh, I'm sure this did something for someone.  Cheers.

Pet Peeves. "Mrs StuckInSchool".

DISCLAIMER:  Lengthy Post.

Oh, social media.  I have such a love-hate relationship with you.  On one hand, I have "friends" on my Facebook that are only there because... well, I'm nosy and quite a few of them are complete and utter train-wrecks.  I mean, no one actually likes a train-wreck - but it's one of those dirty little things that you just can't help but watch.  Let's be honest... there is a whole CATEGORY of people who I just don't un-friend simply because there's almost always some kind of screwy drama going on in their life.  Some of the cray-cray they freely and regularly post is downright titillating.

And then there are the other "friends" - those who are not necessarily in the smash-crash category, yet they are just assholes in their own right.  The posts where you'll do a double-take and think "where in the jolly FUCK did THAT just come from?"

Pet Peeve Numero Uno

The fact is, unless you talk to someone on a regular basis (whether it by by messenger, text, telephone, email, etc...), most people on FB are not really your *friends* (per se).  They are acquaintances.  Big huge difference.  I might "like" a status every so often, but I don't actually interact with most of the (close to) 300 "friends" on my Facebook.  I find myself interacting with the same real friends every day.  The others??  I don't really care.  They are usually there for my amusement and I'll un-friend if they bore me.  

They are not FRIENDS.  They are acquaintances.  Learn the difference.

However...

Pet Peeve Numero Dos

Then there are the "Mrs StuckInSchool"** [women] who write statuses about drinking games and previously "being fat" - you know the type.  They hit their pinnacle, their prime, their best, before reaching the ancient age of 21.  They are the people who would go back in time JUST BECAUSE their experience in the public education penitentiary was just *the best*.  Usually, they were the über-popular preppy or sports-lettered douche-bags that almost everyone else despised.  Back in the day, they were bullies and usually quite unpleasant to those not in their clique.  

Well, they haven't changed.  Posting a picture of a piece of cheesecake with the idiotic hashtag of "foreverthefatgirl" (heads-up, peeps - that twat was never fat - and she wouldn't have wanted to go back to high school had she been) AND "thisiswhyicrossfit" (well, duh - we ALL KNOW you *crossfit* because you post your fucking exercise list on Facebook or Instagram EVERY day) just screams "Attention Whore!".  Nothing more, nothing less.  Oh, and it makes me think less of these "ladies" than I did before, if that is even possible. 

Oh, and let's not forget about posting all the beer-pong and drinking games you do at almost-forty.  It's pathetic and goes to show that some people never evolve.

PS...  I hid "Mrs StuckInSchool" from my newsfeed today because I wanted to hand her a steaming pile of sarcasm on a shit platter.  Being the upstanding adult I am, I vented to two of my best friends (one who talked me down - thank you!!) and so I didn't write anything nasty.  

Pet Peeve Numero Tres

Sometimes being an adult about things simply blows dead donkey dick.  Please see *Pet Peeve Numero Dos* for just one of the reasons (minus bills, car insurance, and long-term planning for expensive things) as to why being a grown-up can suck.

Pet Peeve Numero Cuatro

Passive-aggressive people.  It's one thing to be Politically Correct at times and it's also another thing to simply keep your trap shut if you know that you absolutely cannot say something nice.  I'm an atheist, but that doesn't mean that whenever an acquaintance (who may be religious) posts something god-tastic on their wall, I should then reply with a litany of why *I* think their religion sucks.  Which is why I find it so shitty when I write something or post an article about atheism and a religious person feels compelled to tell me that I need Jesus or Allah or L. Ron Hubbard.  Really????  

And it's almost always done in that sick, syrup-y sweet passive-aggressive fashion that I can't respond to unless I want to look like an absolute and utter bitch.  Because these people have made an art out of appearing like they actually care - and therefore, I'm supposed to thank them for underhandedly insulting me.  

Just give me the same consideration and keep your snarky little comments off my wall, mmmmmmmkay???

Pet Peeve Numero Cinco

The inconsiderate hippie bastards who live upstairs.  I'm tired of their shitty music, on a weeknight, when someone in this house has to get up at 5:30 AM to go to work.  I get that they are on a different "work" (which I'm really not sure that either one of them do steadily) schedule, but a little fucking consideration would go a long way.  

I will remedy this, however.  Tomorrow morning, I will be sure to play my music extremely loud around 8:00 AM.  This usually makes them think before playing recorders, tambourines, and bad Bob Dylan music until all hours (happens about once a week).  I'm thinking that some speed metal will hit the spot.  For me, at least.  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So...  I could probably go on for a while more - but quite honestly, I think that this is enough for today.  Being negative is really not really productive, but ranting about what makes me crazy and getting it off my chest is very therapeutic.  

**Special thanks to TD - for the term "Mrs StuckInSchool".  You are so spot-on with that.